This Taoist Master is too Frivolous

The normally bustling hilltop suddenly fell eerily quiet.

Everyone was staring in disbelief at what was happening. Fear gradually crept into their eyes, especially for the middle-aged couple who were closest and could see everything most clearly…

Even Officer Wang, Xiao Zhang, and Chen Ruolin were shocked!

Not to mention them, even the three ghosts didn’t anticipate Xu Yang’s move!

Li Si was clutching his head and shouting, “Master, it’s crooked, it’s crooked… My head has been put on crookedly.”

So-

Xu Yang pulled his head off again and placed it back on.

Li Si, with his head tilted, looked at Xu Yang and howled, “Master, it’s still crooked.”

Xu Yang took two steps back and used his spiritual power to “see”, noticing that Li Si’s face was towards his shoulder. He blushed slightly, feeling a bit embarrassed, but roared, “So what if it’s crooked? Wiry are you howling… Can’t I just straighten it for you?”

While cursing, his hands were already supporting Li Si’s head, and he gave it a twist.

“Ghost!!!”

A middle-aged woman, who had been holding it in, finally couldn’t help screaming. Her body quivered, her eyes rolled back, and she fell straight back.

“Ghost!”

In the crowd, those with less courage also screamed, and the previously silent hilltop was thrown into chaos once again.

Xu Yang quickly said, “Don’t be afraid, everyone… We’re good… We’re good ghosts, we’re just here to join the feast, we won’t harm you!”

After hearing this, the people became even more terrified.

Even a woman was so scared that she wet her pants and was shaking under the table.

The Yin wedding indeed had the tradition of preparing the “Yin Feast” for ghosts, but they never thought that real ghosts would come to eat!

Xu Yang flipped his hand and picked up the “Broadsword”, a Daoist artifact made of 1200 kg black flame stone, and smashed it into the ground. With a loud bang, a large pit was smashed directly into the ground, and it felt like the entire hill trembled.

“Damn it!”

“Shut up!”

“Wiry are you all howling… I told you I won’t harm you, what are you afraid of?”

He lifted the sledgehammer, squinted fiercely, and “looked” at the crowd, shouting, “Whoever screams again… I’ll smash their dog’s head!”

This time, the scene quieted down instantly.

“Sure enough, humans and ghosts are the same. If you are kind to them, they dare to trample on you. If you hammer them like they’re insignificant, they’ll treat you like a god.”

Xu Yang sighed in his heart and harshly spoke to the middle-aged man who was on the ground trying to revive his wife, “Old man, are you going to let us join in or not? If not, I’ll kill you now.”

The man of the house managed a sobbing laugh, “Gentle…ghost sirs, please, here, chef, chef, serve the dishes!”

A large table of dishes and wine quickly filled the table.

Li Si, the hungry ghost, was drooling. When he saw all the food and drink, his eyes glistened with greed. But he didn’t dare to eat until Xu Yang moved his chopsticks, so he looked pitifully at Xu Yang and said, “Master… can we eat now?”

“Eat what, wait!”

Xu Yang picked up his chopsticks and began to eat.

After tasting a piece of cold beef tendon, he called out, “Lao Wang, Xiao Zhang, Xiao Chen… eat, let’s eat first!”

At first, Xiao Zhang and Chen Ruolin were a little resistant.

After all, Li Si had told them on the way that these two tables were “Yin Feasts”, prepared specifically for ghosts!

However, when they saw Xu Yang and Officer Wang tucking in heartily, they couldn’t help but gulp down their saliva, eventually picking up their chopsticks… With their first bite, their eyes brightened, and Chen Ruolin even said, “Country banquets are the best. This pork knuckle is so fragrant.”

It was already 1 a.m.

Everyone was rather hungry, and it didn’t take long for them to finish most of the food on the table.

The three ghosts sat on one side, dry-eyed, as Li Si’s drool formed a small river on the ground. He was so pitiful that he was about to cry.

Only after the four people had finished eating, did they grab the leftovers and deeply sniff them.

Visible white mist was sucked into their nostrils, which amazed Chen Ruolin, who asked, “What are they doing?”

“Eating.”

Xu Yang responded, “Haven’t you ever seen how ghosts eat?”

In her heart, Chen Ruolin retorted, ‘How the hell would I have seen that!’

She shook her head.

Xu Yang then explained, “Yin spirits and malevolent beings have no physical bodies. Their bodies are coagulated from yin energy and they don’t have a digestive system, so they eat by absorbing the essence of food…”

After finishing the feast…

It was time to get down to business.

Officer Wang gave a signal to the two young officers, and they immediately started to mingle with the people at the other tables.

When the people at the table saw these three “ghosts” coming over, they all stood up and tried to leave, but Xu Yang lifted his hammer and calmly said, “What are you running for? Sit down and eat… Don’t worry, we’re full and won’t eat yours.”

The four of them gathered at the table, Lao Wang smiled and took out a cigarette from his pocket, handing one to each man at the table. As he distributed them he asked, “I was just wondering… Who’s the Yin wedding for?”

Those people took the cigarettes, but they didn’t dare to smoke.

One of the younger men, seeing Xu Yang and Officer Wang puffing away, timidly asked, “Even… you ghosts smoke?”

“It’s none of your business, is it?”

Xu Yang retorted, saying: “I am asking you… What’s the situation with this family? It’s been many years since anyone here in Wu City organized a Yin marriage.”

“What are you ghosts… doing asking about that?”

The man spoke weakly again, still showing a cautious expression. He cast a glance behind Xu Yang and asked suspiciously, “You claim to be a ghost, so why do you have a shadow?”

Lao Wang, Xiao Zhang, and Chen Ruolin instantly became tense.

Right!

Wiry would a ghost have a shadow?

What if they get exposed?

Compared to them, Xu Yang…

He took a leisurely puff on his cigarette, exhaled several smoke rings and questioned, “Do you suspect I’m not a ghost? If I’m not, then how am I alive after twisting my head off?”

The man glanced at the massive hammer Xu Yang was holding, trembling as he stammered, “You twisted off that man’s head… I saw that those three don’t have shadows.”

As he spoke…

He pointed to Li Si and the others’ table, saying, “And your dining habits are different. They smell their food, but you eat.”

“So, you’re implying… I’m human?”

Xu Yang was taken aback.

Then, as if he’d heard the funniest joke in the world, he burst into laughter. But instantly, his laughter ceased. His smiling face turned cold in a second, he reached out into the thin air, the man sitting across him felt a lightness in his body, involuntarily lifting off the ground, and allowed his neck to be caught by Xu Yang.

Xu Yang tightened his grip on his neck, slowly opened his eyes.

A gray fog filled his eyes and a drop of blood slowly seeped from the corner of his eyes, he uttered coldly: “Do you even dare to doubt me?”

With a quick movement, he slammed the man to the ground, punching and kicking him, then grabbed the man’s collar and lifted him back up, asking: “Ready to talk properly now?”

“I’ll tell, I promise…”

With bruises all over the face, the man was quick to say, “The one who organized the event today is my uncle. He has two sons. The elder son, my cousin, died 14 years ago on a construction site.”

“My aunt and uncle were heartbroken… After my cousin’s funeral, they took the compensation from the construction company and went somewhere else to do business.”

“They made a fortune there and then had a second child… The younger son is six and a half years old now, but he can’t speak or walk. Despite visiting many hospitals, my aunt and uncle didn’t find the cause.”

“A few days ago, a geomancy master came to our village. He said that my cousin was being haunted by his deceased older brother, that’s why he’s in such a state. Because my cousin had not married before his untimely death, the only way to rectify this situation would be to pair him with a Yin spirit…”

Officer Wang and his two younger colleagues exchanged glances.

“Oh?”

Xu Yang, with his eyes closed, twitched lightly at his eyelashes, asking “Where did you get the corpse from?”

“I don’t know!”

The man continued: “The man analyzing the situation said, give him 150,000 dollars, and he would take care of the rest. As for where the bones come from, we don’t need to ask.”

Just then, car horns whistled from the bottom of the mountain.

The young man suddenly cried, “He’s here, the man examining the situation has brought the bride!”

Xu Yang let go, stood up, and looked down the mountain.

However, blind as he was, and his spiritual power couldn’t radiate that far, he couldn’t see anything.

Officer Wang looked down there too, but as a mortal, he couldn’t see far. He could only see two bright white lights at the foot of the mountain. Those must be the modified headlights of the “one examining the situation”.

“Master Xu, what do we do?”

Officer Wang came to Xu Yang’s side and asked in a low voice.

“Stay calm, and watch quietly.”

Xu Yang thought back to the Yin energy and the smell of corruption on “Ren Yuandi”, then whispered, “I have a feeling that tonight’s events might not be that simple.”

A moment later, someone said, “Master Lin is here!”

The crowd at the tomb began to greet him.

In the darkness, a Daoist in yellow ritual clothing, holding a whisk, was walking confidently toward them. He looked to be around sixty years old, sported a goatee, had his gray and white hair tied up in a bun, exuding an air of majesty that suggested he was something of a spiritual master.

Four people followed the Daoist.

There was “Ren Yuandi”, with whom Xu Yang had “crossed paths”.

They were carrying a stretcher on which sat a woman made of paper, painted with eerie eyes and two large red circles on her face, surrounded by wreaths of flowers front and back.

The moment “Master Lin” arrived, the musicians started to play, and the suona piped out a stirring tune.

This background music subtly added to the daunting air around “Master Lin”.

Officer Wang took a good look at “Master Lin” and turned around in alarm to find Xu Yang wearing a mask of a fearsome green-faced and fanged creature with a little bit of green luminescence on its teeth.

“Master Xu, what are you doing?”

“Ren Yuandi has seen me before, I’m afraid he would recognize me… Officer Wang, don’t make any moves yet. Let’s enjoy the show for now.”

Xu Yang ‘saw’ that “Master Lin” was enveloped in a dense Yin energy.

Besides, Ren Yuandi and his group also carried a strong Yin energy.

The heaviest Yin energy, however, was coming from the paper figure on the stretcher they were carrying. This figure was swirling in several strands of Yin energy, breeding resentment. And faintly, it seemed like traces of blood were spreading all over, there was a sense that a “red-dressed” vengeful spirit was about to be born!

PS: Haha, didn’t see that coming, did you? I’ve updated another chapter!